lotta regan: Tips to Survive the Long Haul of Long-Distance

Tips to Survive the Long Haul of Long-Distance | GentlemanREDUX.com ? 02/02/2012Posted in: WOMEN & DATING

The number one thing that I almost unanimously hear from people when asked is that ?long-distance relationships suck?.? Haha ? I?ll be the first to say that they aren?t lying.? There?s a lot of quality time that you miss with your special someone and a lot of moments where you?ll question if the situation is worth the hassle (trust me ? I?ve been there, done that).? But when people say that long-distance relationships are impossible ? that?s where I have to jump in and object.

Long Distance Relationship

You see ? I don?t think that distance kills relationships.? I think as long as people decide to be there for one another, the relationship can work.? I?ve done a post related to the subject before, but that was from a third-party video provider.

Here?s a list of things that I have learned that help keep relationships going regardless of the distance?

You can?t see each other ? so you have to talk: I know we?re all busy in this day and age, but make time to talk (even if you have to schedule a set time) ? and treat that time like it?s sacred.? Communication is key in any relationship, but it?s VITAL in any long-distance situation.
Honesty is the best route, even if it stings a little: Fact is in a normal relationship you can conceal things and eventually let them go because of your exposure to your significant other.? You know how it goes? those ?I just can?t stay mad at you? moments.? Well long-distance really doesn?t provide that luxury because you really only have your perspective on a lot of things concerning your relationship.? You have to speak your mind and give your special someone a change to respond, even if it?s just to clarify your own beliefs on a given situation or topic.? Fair warning though ? what you need clarified won?t always be nice, but you have to practice taking in the ?good? and the ?bad? as best you can while you two talk.
Swallow your pride:? If you always have to be right, long-distance may not work for you.? Sometimes you?ll have to let things go just for the sake of your distant-fondness continuing.? In any relationship in life you?re supposed to choose your battles, well multiply that by like 10 if you?re in a long-distance romance.? (Continue on to #4)
Don?t go to sleep angry:? When you aren?t around someone, like ever, because of distance ? things have a tendency to fester and magnify.? Anger is a strong poison in a long-distance relationship.? It makes you think of how easily you could walk away from the relationship and so on.? Haha ? trust me, it?s very important that your far-away someone has positive happy thoughts of you.? Don?t let an argument last longer than the day.? And tying this in with #3, learn to apologize and mean it.? Get over yourself for the sake of the relationship.
Get a friend on your side:? Everyone is going to have something to say about your relationship arrangement, and most of it is going to be negative (seriously).? Through all of that mess, you?re sometimes going to need a rock to keep you grounded.? Find a friend who likes both you and your sweetheart, and go to them in your times of weakness for a refresher on how great you and your boo-thang (slang) are together.? That person will come in handy when you?re going through a rough-patch.
Remember you can ?be there? without actually being there: Skype, Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, Instant Messaging, Text Messages, Instagram, and so on and on? Technology exists for a reason.? Learn how to use these tools to your advantage for your romance.? Don?t think it?s just for special occasions either ? learn how to use these things in your daily activities.
Practice fairness in your visitation schedule: Avoid one-sided trips.? One person SHOULD NOT always have to come and see the other.? I understand if you?re both well-of financially, but assuming you have average pockets like most of America ? it?s unfair if one person always has to sacrifice money for plane tickets and outings once they arrive.? All that it will do is create stress and resentment in the long-run if that pace is kept up, so mix up the travel responsibilities.
It?s the thought that counts: Be sure to let the other person know that you?re thinking of them from time-to-time.? If you?re in a meeting at work, shoot out a quick text and tell them ?I?m in this meeting, but I?m thinking about you?? (Proceed to #9)
Corniness is cool: Normally there are advisable limits to ?caking? (pillow-talk) in relationships, but with long-distance ? what else do you have?? Don?t feel like a jackass if you tell someone you miss them.? They deserve/desire it and you?re just being honest.? Screw what others may say, and you?ll go further in the long run.
Strive to remove doubt: If you?re going to go in, then go all in.? You?ll have your period of complaining ? but try not to do too much of that (I have a problem with this one and work on it regularly).? Why?? Because it will make your significant other worry about the status of your relationship and pull back emotionally.? There reservation will lead to you losing attraction and then the relationship will be over.? So just try to stay positive, and when you feel negative ? report it to that friend from #5.? Don?t always unload on your lover because it?ll begin to come off as you venting your hate for the situation on them.? If you?re in a long-distance relationship you know what you signed up for.? Just suck it up, and move on.

That?s not an all inclusive list ? but it?s just a sampling of what I?m learning as I personally go through this journey myself.? I have a different perspective on long-distance now than I ever did before simply because I?m actually doing it now and determined to make it work as best I can.? We all know the saying? ?When life gives you lemons? and what not?

Anyway ? that?s all.? My mind was there this morning, so I felt I should share.

Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship?? If so, what advice would you offer?? What do you think are the positives (they do exist) and negatives of long-distance relationships?? Speak your mind on this post and anything related to it in the Comment Section below.

Peace and thanks for reading.

GentlemanREDUX brings useful Modern Gent Lifestyle content everyday.
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About Johnnie at GentlemanREDUX

Johnnie Weathersby III is the founder and "Lead Scribbling Gent" of GentlemanREDUX.com. He was born and (proudly) raised in Kansas City, MO - smack dab in the Midwest Region of the US. An avid blogger, tweeter, and general social media advocate - Johnnie is a self-confessed Gent in training with a constant slant towards communication and personal growth.

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Tips to Survive the Long Haul of Long-Distance | GentlemanREDUX.com ? 02/02/2012Posted in: WOMEN & DATING

Long Distance Relationship

Here?s a list of things that I have learned that help keep relationships going regardless of the distance?

You can?t see each other ? so you have to talk: I know we?re all busy in this day and age, but make time to talk (even if you have to schedule a set time) ? and treat that time like it?s sacred.? Communication is key in any relationship, but it?s VITAL in any long-distance situation.
Honesty is the best route, even if it stings a little: Fact is in a normal relationship you can conceal things and eventually let them go because of your exposure to your significant other.? You know how it goes? those ?I just can?t stay mad at you? moments.? Well long-distance really doesn?t provide that luxury because you really only have your perspective on a lot of things concerning your relationship.? You have to speak your mind and give your special someone a change to respond, even if it?s just to clarify your own beliefs on a given situation or topic.? Fair warning though ? what you need clarified won?t always be nice, but you have to practice taking in the ?good? and the ?bad? as best you can while you two talk.
Swallow your pride:? If you always have to be right, long-distance may not work for you.? Sometimes you?ll have to let things go just for the sake of your distant-fondness continuing.? In any relationship in life you?re supposed to choose your battles, well multiply that by like 10 if you?re in a long-distance romance.? (Continue on to #4)
Don?t go to sleep angry:? When you aren?t around someone, like ever, because of distance ? things have a tendency to fester and magnify.? Anger is a strong poison in a long-distance relationship.? It makes you think of how easily you could walk away from the relationship and so on.? Haha ? trust me, it?s very important that your far-away someone has positive happy thoughts of you.? Don?t let an argument last longer than the day.? And tying this in with #3, learn to apologize and mean it.? Get over yourself for the sake of the relationship.
Get a friend on your side:? Everyone is going to have something to say about your relationship arrangement, and most of it is going to be negative (seriously).? Through all of that mess, you?re sometimes going to need a rock to keep you grounded.? Find a friend who likes both you and your sweetheart, and go to them in your times of weakness for a refresher on how great you and your boo-thang (slang) are together.? That person will come in handy when you?re going through a rough-patch.
Remember you can ?be there? without actually being there: Skype, Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, Instant Messaging, Text Messages, Instagram, and so on and on? Technology exists for a reason.? Learn how to use these tools to your advantage for your romance.? Don?t think it?s just for special occasions either ? learn how to use these things in your daily activities.
Practice fairness in your visitation schedule: Avoid one-sided trips.? One person SHOULD NOT always have to come and see the other.? I understand if you?re both well-of financially, but assuming you have average pockets like most of America ? it?s unfair if one person always has to sacrifice money for plane tickets and outings once they arrive.? All that it will do is create stress and resentment in the long-run if that pace is kept up, so mix up the travel responsibilities.
It?s the thought that counts: Be sure to let the other person know that you?re thinking of them from time-to-time.? If you?re in a meeting at work, shoot out a quick text and tell them ?I?m in this meeting, but I?m thinking about you?? (Proceed to #9)
Corniness is cool: Normally there are advisable limits to ?caking? (pillow-talk) in relationships, but with long-distance ? what else do you have?? Don?t feel like a jackass if you tell someone you miss them.? They deserve/desire it and you?re just being honest.? Screw what others may say, and you?ll go further in the long run.
Strive to remove doubt: If you?re going to go in, then go all in.? You?ll have your period of complaining ? but try not to do too much of that (I have a problem with this one and work on it regularly).? Why?? Because it will make your significant other worry about the status of your relationship and pull back emotionally.? There reservation will lead to you losing attraction and then the relationship will be over.? So just try to stay positive, and when you feel negative ? report it to that friend from #5.? Don?t always unload on your lover because it?ll begin to come off as you venting your hate for the situation on them.? If you?re in a long-distance relationship you know what you signed up for.? Just suck it up, and move on.

Anyway ? that?s all.? My mind was there this morning, so I felt I should share.

Peace and thanks for reading.

GentlemanREDUX brings useful Modern Gent Lifestyle content everyday.
Like what you're reading? Follow GRDX on Facebook & Twitter!

About Johnnie at GentlemanREDUX

2 Comments

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Source: http://gentlemanredux.com/blog/2012/02/02/tips-to-survive-the-long-haul-of-long-distance/

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Source: http://eltonclark.typepad.com/blog/2012/02/tips-to-survive-the-long-haul-of-long-distance-gentlemanredux.html

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lotta regan

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Tips to Survive the Long Haul of Long-Distance | GentlemanREDUX ...

About Johnnie at GentlemanREDUX

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About Johnnie at GentlemanREDUX

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